Thursday, July 14, 2016

Order in the court

And now, upon the news that Tom Brady's appeal of his appeal of two appeals of a counter-appeal of a counter-counter-appeal has been denied, a brief reverie: What Would It Sound Like If He Brought Deflategate To The Supreme Court?

JUSTICE CLARENCE THOMAS: Hey, look, it's Tom Brady!


JUSTICE ANTHONY KENNEDY:  And, look, he brought Gronk with him!

JUSTICE STEPHEN BREYER: Reall--? Oh, nice try, Kennedy.

JUSTICE SONIA SOTOMAYOR: Hmm. I thought he'd be taller.

JUSTICE ELENA KAGAN: Plus, Aaron Rodgers is better. And remember, Eli kicked his ass twice!

JUSTICE RUTH BADER GINSBURG: Tom Brady, Schmom Brady. Let's talk about Trump. What a wackadoodie!

CHIEF JUSTICE ROBERTS: What th--? I thought I told you guys I didn't want to hear this case! Dammit, I'm the Chief Justice! Why doesn't anyone listen to me?

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