And now today's not-really-news moment coming to you from the capital of Jameisville, aka, Tallahassee, Fla.
A Florida State disciplinary committee, like the Tallahassee prosecutor before it, has decided it didn't see nothin' where the Seminoles' star quarterback is concerned.
Winston was cleared of all charges that he violated four sections of the school's code of conduct, two for sexual misconduct and two for endangerment, in the matter of an alleged sexual assault. It was the same decision prosecutor Willie Meggs, chuckling and mugging for the cameras, made a year ago when he decided not to bring criminal charges against Winston.
"We will consider an appeal but right now we feel a little duped," Baine Kerr, one of the woman's lawyers, said in an emailed statement. "At some point we have to recognize that Florida State is never going to hold [Jameis] Winston responsible."
Well ... no. But, then, when has he been held responsible for any of his various misdeeds at FSU?
Bottom line here is football rules at a football school, and right now Florida State, a gold-card football school, is gearing up for college football's first playoff. A suspension or expulsion from school for the Seminoles' star would have really harshed their mellow -- plus severely hurt their shot at a cut of the $4 million payout to the conferences of the two teams that reach the national title game. Which is on top of their cut of the $6 million payout to the ACC the Seminoles have already made by securing a semifinal bid.
So it's pure economics that drive this, just as it does everywhere in big-ticket college football, a vast corporate enterprise hiding out in the groves of academe. And so, let the queuing up at the ATM continue unabated, as Winston proves once again he's as adept at escaping peril off the field as he is on it.
"Somehow Jameis Winston still wins," Kerr said. "The order doesn't even follow the Student Conduct Code and it ignores the bulk of the evidence."
Oddly, he sounds surprised.