Somewhere out there, you just know Al Davis is shaking his bony fist and rasping, "Just relocate, baby!"
This upon the news that -- in a classic example of the apple never falling far from the tree -- his son is talking with officials in San Antonio about moving the Oakland Raiders there.
This would be in keeping with stalwart Black-and-Silver tradition, which holds that if you can jack around with Oakland, you do it. Remember when Al, the godfather himself, moved the Raiders to L.A. for awhile and the moved them back to Oakland?
Now Mark Davis, the current owner, is playing the same sort of game with San Antonio. Maybe he figures NFL commish Roger Goodell is too distracted by the Ray Rice kerfuffle to notice that the Riverwalk and the Bay Area aren't exactly the same thing, geographically speaking.
Roger Goodell's office. Sometime in 2015.
Rog is looking at an aerial shot from the Goodyear blimp. It's going live from the Chiefs-at-the-Raiders.
"Hey, look at this, Martha!" Rog yelps to his secretary. "Damned if they didn't move the Alamo to Oakland!"
Or something like that.
In any case, San Antonio isn't as loopy as it sounds. With a population of roughly 1.4 million, it's roughly 2 1/2 times bigger than Oakland, for one thing. And it's not like pro football hasn't been there before; aficionados of the late, great USFL surely remember the San Antonio Gunslingers, who played two seasons, drew just over 15,000 per game one season and just shy of 12,000 the next, and whose quarterback was Rick Neuheisel -- now a studio analyst for the Pac 12 Network.
So, yeah, this could work. It's football and it's Texas and, heck, maybe the Raiders could bring back Neuheisel for the coin flip of the inaugural home game. And wear throwback green-and-white Gunslingers jerseys for the opener.
The San Antonio Raiders.
It sings, I tell you. Sings.