And now this week's installment of what Time magazine has called "The most insightful five minutes of your day!," and "Holy gee, look at this!", the NFL In So Many Words:
1. Hot cocoa by the fire.
2. An invigorating game of Parcheesi.
3. A "Hollywood Squares" binge-watch.
4. (Three ways Aaron Rodgers could have whiled away his down time in the second half after throwing six touchdowns in the first half and having nothing left to do against the Bears).
5. No, son, those aren't the Pittsburgh Steelers. The Pittsburgh Steelers would never lose to anyone as pathetic as the Jets.
6. Yes, son, those are the Cleveland Browns. I know they look suspiciously competent, but, really, it's them.
7. The Seahawks are finished. No one could possibly come back from beating the Giants by only three touchdowns.
8. The Patriots continue to be finished. No one could possibly come back from such a listless effort against Bye.
9. Hey, look, it's the Lions!
10. And they're still winning!