And now a one-time-only-but-who-knows Blob feature, My Country 'Tis Of WTH, in which we highlight the weird and mindlessly cruel doings that make America the home for the mentally unhinged we know and love, God bless it.
Let's start at the Santa Clara, Calif., Police Department, shall we?
Where, Tuesday afternoon, the goofball who ran out on the field during the Monday night NFL game between the Rams and the 49ers, waving flare emitting pink smoke, filed a police report against Rams linebacker Bobby Wagner. This is because, after the goofball eluded security, Wagner came off the sidelines and introduced him to the NFL's concussion protocols.
The goofball is now claiming Wagner assaulted him.
The rest of us are simply saying this: "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes."
Also, here's a live look at the police officer who filed the report.
Less hilarious, and considerably more disgusting, is what's happening in the domain of the il Duce of Florida, Ron DeSantis. Among other oppressive edicts, the high school athletic association in il Duce's domain is now requiring girls who want to play high school sports to answer five questions about, um, their menstrual cycles.
The Blob's first thought about this is there are some sickos in the Florida High School Athletic Association who have an unhealthy fascination with the menstrual cycles of teenage girls.
My second is there are a lot of folks sick in their souls in il Duce's domain, starting with il Duce himself.
DeSantis, after all, is the one who pushed through a law that bans transgender youth from participating in high school sports. That's what's led to the FHSAA's over-the-line questionnaire, because oh, my God, what if those sneaky transgenders try to RUIN GIRLS SPORTS with their sneaky transgender ways?
As someone who has friends with transgender kids, I find this beyond just disgusting. I find it damn near criminal in its cruelty for cruelty's sake. Considering there are so few transgender athletes out there, it's a solution in search of a problem that amounts to simple fear and loathing of those Not Like Us.
I mean, what's next? Making transgenders wear a cloth "T" on their clothing?
This is of course an exaggeration to make a point, but not that much of an exaggeration. The point is there's a whole segment of America out there that regards transgenders as less than human. And we all know what a dark path proceeds from that.
In Florida, it's leading to questions that violate not only privacy but a young girl's sense of self. If I were a girls coach, I would instruct all my athletes to scrawl "NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS" across the five offending questions. Then I'd tell my school administrators, sorry, guess we won't have girls sports anymore.
Thankfully, this sort of resistance is already happening, of a fashion. Parents and doctors in Florida are raising unshirted hell, and the Blob imagines enough of them refusing to cooperate that it will render the FHSAA's edict unenforceable.
One can only hope.
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