Friday, May 19, 2023

Grownups ruin everything

 Saw a piece by Vanessa Yurkovich of CNN the other day and posted it to my Twitter page, and it sparked an interesting discussion. Or lament, to be more accurate.

The piece was about youth sports, and how it's getting harder and harder to find umpires/referees/officials to work them, and coaches to coach them. According to the story, the number of Babe Ruth softball and baseball umpires has declined by almost a third since 2017, and, between 2018 and 2022, youth sports in general have lost nearly 20,000 officials just at the high school level.

A lot of that, the story says, is because of idiot grownups who can't keep their mouths shut.

This is not especially news, as youth umpire/official/coach abuse has been a regular feature of the sporting landscape for several years now. Sometimes it involves merely verbal abuse. In some cases, though, it involves actual physical abuse, grownups coming out of the bleachers to pound on some poor kid who's just trying to make a little walking-around money.

Or, worse, getting into full-on brawls with other grownups, while their kids look on in bewilderment. We've all seen the video.

Some of my friends and former colleagues who weighed in on my post have their own tales. One mentioned a Little League game at a local park with what looked like a parent umping  and base coaches having to make fair/foul calls. Another said he was glad his kids were grown and he no longer had to be a travel coach. 

Grownups ruin everything. We've known that forever, but the reminders are all too prevalent these days.

Know what I wish?

When I'm in full unicorn-fantasy mode, I wish this: That the kids would become the grownups when their parents behave like children.

It'll never happen, of course, because kids are kids and they're taught to listen to their coaches and respect their elders, at least if they're raised right. But wouldn't you love to see the following at some Little League game, just one time?

Obnoxious parent: Hey, Pizza Face! Are you blind? How can you (expletive) call that? .You're an (expletive) (expletive)! Did your mom have any kids that lived?

Obnoxious Parent's kid and all of his or her teammates, in perfect unison: SHUT UP!

Beautiful.

Of course, their coach would probably put the kibosh on that. Unless of course I was their coach, in which case I would not only encourage it but join in.

I suppose that's why I would be a lousy candidate to coach youth sports.

The larger point here, however, is the games belong to the kids, or should, and the kids need to start taking them back. Maybe stage a walkout if Mom or Dad can't keep his or her mouth shut. Tell Mom or Dad they're embarrassing you and ruining the game for you. A nice icy Mom or Dad stare when Mom or Dad start in might do the trick.

Hey. Someone's gotta be the adult here. Might as well be the kids.

Who, frankly, never seem to get nearly as upset over a bad call or a loss. That's because it's a kid's game, not Game 7 of the World Series or the Super Bowl or the World Cup. All the kids want to know is whether or not Coach is gonna spring for ice cream again.

In other words: The kids are the role models here. Be like 'em, grownups.



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