Monday, March 25, 2019

Chalk outlines, Part Deux

In the end, even geometry favored the overdog.

Two times Sunday in the space of as many breaths, Duke's season hung on the square root of the hypotenuse, or something like that. First, B.J. Taylor's driving runner spun high and delicate off the glass, but not quite delicate enough; then, Aubrey Dawkins' follow tip just ahead of the horn kissed the glass again, took another lap or two around that pitiless rim -- and fell off.

And so top-seed Duke 77, 9-seed Central Florida 76, and the entire first weekend of the NCAA Tournament was, in the way that most matters, a bust. The Big Knockout never happened; in the one game where it should have, being both lucky and good proved just enough for the Dukies. And so we go to a Sweet Sixteen without a true Cinderella, without a storyline that will rivet us the way Sister Jean and Loyola did a year ago.

Sixteen teams still alive in this thing, and 15 of them are seeded 5 or higher. All four 1, 2 and 3 seeds are still present. The East and West regionals are 100 percent chalk, with the top four seeds remaining; the Midwest features the 1, 2, 3 and 5 seeds -- and the 5 seed, Auburn, should probably have been seeded fourth instead of the Kansas team it dismantled Sunday.

Every one of the 16 remaining teams are from the Power 5 conferences except Houston, which represents the only-one-tick-lower American Athletic Conference. And the only "Cinderella" left in this?

That would be 12-seed Oregon, which won the Pac-12 tournament. Which is sort of like a Kardashian masquerading as Cinderella.

And, yes, while this promises some terrific basketball this weekend, it also promises zero romance. Unless you're a fan or alum of the 16 assorted big shots, who is left the casual observer can get behind? Who's still around to whom he or she can give his or her heart? Can you really plight your troth to, I'm sorry, Oregon?

Don't think so. What we've got here are the royals in short pants and sneakers: A whole lot of glitz and glamour, signifying nothing. Because without any of the bootstrap storylines that have always put the Mad in March Madness, what are we left with?

March Meh-ness, that's what. One Shining Moment, hold the Shine.

Damn you, geometry. Damn you.

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