Lovely craziness

Hey, ever'body! Watch this!

-- God

OK. So God did not say that last night. 

Deities do not care who wins college football games, no matter what some folks in South Bend, Indiana, might think. Deities have bigger concerns, like why they gave free will to some of the boneheads who worship them. Therefore it's fairly certain God was not wearing Florida State garnet-and-gold last night and waving a little pennant with Bobby Bowden's picture on it.

("I just like that guy," our heavenly Father did not say. "He's got some stories.")

So, no, all that goofiness that went on in New Orleans last night was not God punishing Brian Kelly, LSU coach and apostate, for leaving Notre Dame for another school. It was just college football being college football.

In other words, it was both stupid and glorious, and it had America grabbing its head in disbelief and cheering mightily at the same time.

Hunter S. Thompson used to refer to certain types of American insanity as "bad craziness." Well, this was lovely craziness.

It started after Florida State scored with nine minutes to play to take a 24-10 lead. LSU responded with a five-minute scoring drive of its own, and with 4:07 left, it was 24-17. And then ...

Well. And then everything went to Padded Cell City.

The Seminoles got the ball back, made a first down thanks to an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty, and then had to punt. Malik Nabers of LSU fielded it at the 8 -- and immediately fumbled it right back to Florida State.

Game over!

Uh, no.

Treshaun Ward ran it down to the 1 on two carries. Then he yakked it up on his third carry when the Seminoles unaccountably ran a pitch play and Ward bobbled it. LSU recovered, and then ...

And then marched 99 yards in 11 plays in the last 1:20, scoring on Jayden Daniels 2-yard pass to Jaray Jenkins as time expired. All that remained was to kick the extra point to force overtime, an--

Uh, no.

A Tiger up front missed a block, Shyheim Brown roared through to get a hand on Damian Ramos' kick, and suddenly the Seminoles were celebrating wildly, having somehow won 24-23 after they spent half the fourth quarter giving it away.

"Mr. Blob," you're saying now. "What sort of damn fool would run a pitch play on the 1-yard line?"

Good question.

"Also Mr. Blob, why didn't Kelly nut up and go for two points and the W against a Florida State defense that was clearly gassed, having been on the field for all but three of the last nine minutes? A defense that had just given up an 11-play, 99-yard drive on top of a 15-play, 75-yard drive?"

Another good question.

Answer: It's college football.

Sometimes it's sublime. Sometimes it's ridiculous. And ain't that beautiful?