And now, MAAGS

 (As in "Making America A Game Show")

(In which the Blob again strays, sort of, from Sportsball World. Standard disclaimer applies.)

Been thinking the last few days about Armband Barbie --  aka, Homeland Security chief Kristi Noem -- and the rest of the Regime, whose latest bright idea is to pit the migrants being snatched by ICE banditos against one another in a reality show. The winners get to stay in the U.S. and work toward citizenship. The losers get, I don't know, shipped off to Devil's Island to hang out with Papillon or something.

(Actually, of course, they get shipped off to El Buchenwald down in El Salvador. Or perhaps to whatever Infidel Motel in Libya we're shipping folks to these days.)

Anyway, the producer of "Duck Dynasty" apparently is all on board with this proposed idea. I suppose this means the reality show will simply be named "Duck!", depending on the nature of the challenges contestants will be asked to perform.

Which could be myriad. Why, you can just see some of 'em ...

1. Stuff That Van.

In which contestants cram themselves into unmarked vans (just like in real life!). Whoever crams their van the fullest wins.

2.  Green Card Scramble.

In which a sackful of fake green cards is dumped inside a circle of contestants, who then crawl around on their hands and knees trying to grab as many as they can while the studio audience laughs and points and says stuff like, "Look at those silly buggers wallow around in the dirt." Maximum humiliation achieved!

Oh, and whoever collects the most fake green cards gets a real one.

3. Whose Kid Is It Anyway?

In which contestants with children are separated from them, blindfolded, and then have to locate their child by the sound of his or her sobbing. Whoever locates their child first wins a solemn vow from Armband Barbie that this will never be done to them for real.

They also can redeem that vow for whatever it's worth. I'm guessing $1.29 or so at Dollar Tree.

4. Kick The Can

A "Survivor" homage in which a group of contestants are stranded in the desert for days and then have cans full of water lined up a few yards away from them. The goal is to grab a can before a guy dressed in Border Patrol gear can kick it over. Whoever gets a drink without sustaining a concussion from a boot to the head wins.

And, OK, so that's enough. I was going to add something involving pugil sticks -- Pugil Sticks The Landing, I'd call it -- but I think the point has been made.

The point being, apparently it's not enough anymore for the Regime to simply snatch people off the street without due process. Not enough to essentially kidnap and disappear them in some third-world gulag.

No, sir. Why not make them perform like trained seals on national TV, too? Why not make them objects of low comedy for the ravening masses?

I struggle to grasp the lack of simple humanity it takes to come up with such a notion. I struggle to grasp the mindless contempt it takes -- and all for human beings who, in many cases, have done nothing to incite it except live and work in the U.S. without the proper paperwork.

Remember when the punishment fitting the crime was a thing?

Not anymore, apparently. Not in this America.

Where my Christian heart asks what these people ever did to deserve such depthless loathing, and gets no answer it remotely understands.