Bill of (no) sale

 Poor Bill Belichick. Nobody wants the guy.

We're deep into the NFL hiring cycle, and Jim Harbaugh is an NFL head coach again, and Raheem Morris is, and Antonio Pierce is sticking around in Las Vegas. Oh, and  Buccaneers offensive coordinator Dave Canales is the new head coach of the Carolina Panthers, the poor guy.

Meanwhile, there sits Bill with his resume hanging out.

So far the guy with six rings in 24 years with the New England Patriots has interviewed with just one team, the Atlanta Falcons. The Dirty Birds went with Morris instead, reportedly because they didn't see Belichick as a long-term solution.

That's because Bill has one item on his resume he can't defend: The calendar.

The calendar says he's 71 years old, and he's been coaching in some capacity for about 50 of those, and he's been a head coach in the NFL for 29 of those. That's a long time in the barrel, unprecedented success or not. I suspect that's why a lot of NFL teams look at him and, like the Falcons, mainly see an expiration date. 

Maybe what everyone also sees is what happened when Tom Brady left, and Bill was left to his own devices. It hasn't been pretty. The Patriots went 7-9 in the first post-Brady season, then they were 10-7, then they were 8-9 and, in Belichick's last season in Foxborough, 4-13.

That's 29-38 when you add 'em up. And no AFC East titles. And one playoff appearance, a wild-card loss to Buffalo.

I don't know if any NFL teams looked at that. I think they mostly looked at the fact he's 71 and has been coaching forever and if you hire him, how much longer can you reasonably think he'll be around?

Whatever the reason, the Falcons passed on him, and no one else seems remotely interested even though several jobs are still open.  And now some people are speculating he might take a year off and try again next year. 

I can't see how how that would make him more employable, frankly. He'll be a year older and will have been out of the game for a year. If no one's biting on him now, why would they then?

"But after Eberflus ruins Caleb Williams, the Bears job might be open!" you're saying now.

Like that's incentive?

No, if the Blob had Belichick's ear (and God knows how that would ever happen), its advice would be to kick back and enjoy retirement. Sleep in. Move somewhere warm and sun yourself on a rock like a gecko. Get yourself one of those cushy analyst gigs like Cowher and Urban Meyer and Jimmy Johnson. 

After all, it's not like Bill's legacy isn't firmly cemented. He's already on Coaching Rushmore with Shula and Lombardi and Noll and Landry. He's in the Hall of Fame as soon as he becomes eligible. What is there left to do except screw up his winning percentage?

Word is he wants to pass Shula as the NFL's all-time winningest coach, but second acts for icons like Belichick rarely play out well. And I'm guessing NFL teams are aware of that, too.

In any case, Bill's phone ain't chirpin'.  And it doesn't seem likely to any time soon.

Sound like a sign from the football gods to me.