Monday, December 11, 2023

A returnable W

 There are Ws and there are Ws, and then there's the W North Dakota State's men's basketball team hung up over the weekend.

That one ought to be returned. And without a refund.

That one was North Dakota State embarrassing itself by beating Oak Hills Christian College 108-14 -- and, no, that's not a misprint. The Bison really did win 108-14, and it probably wasn't an upset that it won 108-14, because Oak Hills Christian College is an NCCAA school from Bemidji, Mn., with an enrollment of 100.

"Did you leave a zero or two off of that, Mr. Blob?" you're asking now.

No. No I did not.

Oak Hills really does have an enrollment of 100, and its athletic department consists of six sports -- basketball, cross country and soccer for men; basketball, cross country and volleyball for women. 

North Dakota State, on the other hand, is a Division I school in Fargo, N.D., with an enrollment of 12,242. It funds 14 sports, seven each for men and women. Why it would even schedule a school like Oak Hills boggles the mind. What, Roger Maris Middle School wasn't available?

I suspect what happened is an opponent for that date suddenly cancelled, and NDSU had to beat every bush in North America to find a replacement. I'm also guessing they paid Oak Hills a decent chunk of change to play them.

What ensued was not a basketball game, but a sad parody of a basketball game. North Dakota State led 60-5 at halftime. Every player on its roster played at least 13 minutes. No starter played more than 20 minutes; three reserves played at least 20.

And yet ...

And yet: 108-14.

It's the sort of mismatch so beyond the pale it not only gives the word "mismatch" a bad name, but makes one the object of ridicule. And, no, I'm not talking about Oak Hills, which no doubt played its heart out. No one's laughing at them; they're laughing at NDSU for scheduling such an abomination in the first place.

When is a W not a W?

When a basketball program decides it violated so many rules of fair play it shouldn't count on its record.

Come on, North Dakota State. Do the honorable thing here.

Return this W to sender.

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