And this week's edition of The NFL In So Many Words, the Blob feature that enlivens America's Tuesday mornings, and of which critics have said "'Enlivens?!' More like curses America's Tuesday mornings", and also "With an especially dark, evil curse bringing pestilence and death upon the land":
1. It's Tuesday morning, and Lamar Jackson just threw another touchdown pass.
2. Oops, he just did it again.
3. Stop it, Lamar! Seriously, dude!
4. It's Tuesday morning, and the Jets are still the Jets.
5. "But we got Davante Adams now!" (Jets fans, and also Aaron Rodgers)
6. "But you're still the Jets!" (America)
7. In other news, it's Tuesday morning, and Patrick Mahomes is still winning; the Patriots, Panthers and Giants are still losing; the Saints just gave up ANOTHER score: and Anthony Richardson is still not the Next Big Thing.
8. "But look! He threw a pass that didn't wind up in Carmel! There's still hope!" (Colts fans)
9. It's Tuesday morning, and skeevy Browns quarterback Deshaun Watson is still out for the season after tearing an Achilles against the Bengals two days ago.
10. "He's been out for the season all season!" (Browns fans, cruelly)
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