Thanks for playing

 Been following all the memes/chortling/out-and-out guffaws attending the latest Monty Python skit starring our Fearless Leader, and I've gotta say, FIFA kinda weak-sistered its usual bribery. A cheapo medal? That's the best it could come up with?

At the very least a sporty automobile could have been involved. Or a golden calf. Or perhaps some choice oil leases in Qatar -- although that might have been a hard nut, considering Qatar already gave F.L. a plane and no doubt wouldn't have liked being hit up again.

But, no, FIFA went the Cracker Jacks route instead.

 Here Mr. President, since you are the grand poobah of peace, we present you the inaugural FIFA Peace Prize, which we just made up to make you feel better about being snubbed by those Nobel snots. Thanks for hosting the 2026 World Cup. And just look at the draw the U.S. got! America, the downtown YMCA and the DaffoDillies from the Little Kickers league, all in the same group! Why, you'd think we rigged it or something (wink-wink)!

Ay-yi-yi. Honestly, the whole business would be satire (or, yes, a Monty Python skit) had Fearless Leader and the rest of the clown show not killed off satire a long time ago. Now it's just another day in Donny World, where participation trophies are scorned except when they're being presented to you-know-who.

Can't wait 'til the U.S. loses to the DafoDillies, and FIFA digs into the Cracker Jacks box again to come up with another Major Award.

Thanks for playing, America. Tell 'em what they've won, Johnny Olson!

Why, it's the home version of "Hollywood Squares"! Includes BOTH Paul Lynde and Charles Nelson Reilly!

Ah, the madness. The madness.