Wednesday, January 4, 2023

The dating game

 Michigan is out, finished at Faber (or, for non-"Animal House" fans, the College Football Playoff), and that can mean only one thing. 

It's time for The Dating Game!

In other words, it's time again for the wooing of Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh, who took the San Francisco 49ers to the Super Bowl and the NFC championship game in consecutive years and then went back to his alma mater in Ann Arbor, where people have been expecting him to return to the NFL as soon as he taught the Wolverines to win again.

Well, he has. The last two seasons, Michigan has gone 25-3, won the Big Ten title twice, beaten Ohio State twice and reached the CFP twice. So, you know, it's time to bail for the En Eff Ell again.

We went through this last year, when Harbaugh apparently had the Vikings job locked up until he flew out to Minneapolis and found out he DIDN'T have the Vikings job locked up, and went back to Ann Arbor in a huff. Apparently he thought he was going to Minnesota for a coronation, not an actual interview, and when he found out otherwise the deal fell through.

Now?

Well, now, despite mucking it up against TCU, he's churning in the rumor mill again. Reports have Indianapolis coveting him and Denver coveting him and Carolina coveting him. A league source says, in fact, he's already talked with the Panthers.

The Broncos?

At least he'd have Russell Wilson to resurrect there.

The Colts?

At least he'd have ... well ... uh ... hmm.

Not sure what appeal that job would have at the moment, other than the fact he played for the Colts and Jim Irsay likes him and therefore he'd throw goo-gobs of dough at him to come save the franchise he's all but ruined. And I suppose if the Colts sign another Quarterback of the Future, Harbaugh the alleged quarterback whisperer would be there to bring him along.

But let's face it, the joint is a major fixer-upper right now. Carolina, on the other hand, is 6-10 and beat division champ Tampa Bay once, and, a week ago, whipped up on a Lions team that had won six of its previous seven games coming in. Plus, the Panthers are playing in a trash-can division that would put the playoffs within easy reach. 

So maybe local media isn't just indulging the spin cycle when the Queen City News reports Harbaugh has "sincere interest" in the job.

In any event, let's bring our contestant out to start asking his questions, Chuck Woolery!

Bachelor No. 1, would you describe yourself as A) a dumpster fire, B) a Hazmat site, or C) a crime scene ...

Let the game begin.

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