Saturday, June 8, 2024

A little Stanley provincialism

 I know who I want to win the Stanley Cup Final that begins tonight, and it's the Edmonton Oilers. And that's not because I have anything against the Florida Panthers, or am a STINKING TRAITOR TO AMERICA, and IF I LOVE CANADA SO MUCH WHY DON'T I JUST MOVE THERE?

Although part of this is about geography, come to think of it. Not to say my cockeyed notions of propriety.

See, I want the Oilers to win because, whether we like it or not here in 'Merica!, hockey is Canada's national sport, and so it only would be right and proper for a Canadian team to return Stanley to his ancestral home. Especially since the last time a Canadian team won the Cup, Turk Broda was still in goal for the Maple Leafs, and Rocket Richard (or maybe Howie Morenz!) was still skating a regular shift for Les Habitants, aka the Montreal Canadiens.

OK. So not really. 

But it has been 31 years since the Habs brought Stanley home to Canada, and that's an intolerably long time for the citizens of our neighbor to the north. For pity's sake, Anaheim, Calif., has won the Cup since then. Two Florida teams have, including the Panthers. Teams from North Carolina, Texas and, oh my God, Las Vegas have.

So, yeah, I'm all in on the Oilers. For one thing, the best player in hockey (Connor McDavid) plays for them. Shouldn't the best player in hockey bench-press Stanley at some point, if only to maintain the integrity of the game itself?

I think so.

I think, even years and years after the NHL metastasized all over creation and back, that there's something weird about Stanley possibly being paraded through the streets of Miami, and not for the first time. When it was Dallas vs. Tampa Bay in the Stanley Cup Final a few years back, I was sure the end times must be near. Hell, I'm still mad about the North Stars fleeing Minnesota -- Minnesota, for God's sake -- to become the generic Dallas Stars deep in the heart of Texas.

And that's despite the fact Minnesota now has another NHL team, the Wild.

But, hey. Times change. Geography and such becomes elastic. The Phoenix Coyotes are headed for Salt Lake City, and apparently they're leaving behind a heartbroken fan base. 

Hockey angst in Arizona. It's a brave new world.

But not that new, dammit. Not that new.

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