When last we left the south side of Chicago, Jerry Reinsdorf's White Sox, an alleged member of the American League, were 3-22 and people were saying mean things about them, like why aren't they down there in the Midwest League with the Beloit Sky Carp and that whole crowd.
Well, guess what, scoffers?
The Pale Hose are a lot less pale than you think!
That's because they've jacked around and won three straight bonafide major league baseball games, and now they're 6-22. So no more talk about the Sky Carp or the Wisconsin Timber Rattlers or even the Cedar Rapids Kernels, whom the Hose could probably beat with one hand tied behind their backs if the knots were loose enough.
Why , shoot, the Hose aren't even the worst team in the majors anymore. That dishonor belongs for the moment to the hideous Miami Marlins, who have lost six games in a row eand are now 6-23, a half-game adrift of the Hose. That leaves the Marl-slugs14 1/2 games behind front-running Atlanta in the NL East , which means they're on pace to finish an astonishing 72.5 games out of first.
Or to put it another way, almost half-a-season out of first.
"See? Not even we're that bad," gloat the Hose, who as of this morning are a mere 13 games out of first in the AL Central.
"Yeah. For today, maybe," reply the suffering Pale Hose fans, holding up their SELL THE TEAM, JERRY signs.
Ouch. Not that's Sox-in' below the belt.
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