Saturday, August 27, 2022

Today in rooster grooming

 Faithful followers of the Blob ("'Followers'," you're saying. "Get him") know it is an unabashed Mascot Appreciation Zone. The weirder or more hilarious the mascot, the better, with special attention paid to mascot fights and other bizarre mascot-related events.

The Blob has never come across one quite as bizarre as this latest mascot-related event, however.

It involves the live rooster that's one of the University of South Carolina Gamecocks mascots, and a spat over a haircut. Or, to be more precise a comb cut.

The previous owners of Sir Big Spur, see, used to clip the bird's comb, on account of the team's nickname is the Fightin' Gamecocks, and the owners of fightin' gamcocks used to clip their combs. This was back when cockfighting was still legal, America being a more barbarous place then which enjoyed that sort of thing.

Well. The new owners of Sir Big Spur want to leave the comb intact, because it's more recognizable as a barnyard rooster. The previous owners regard this as a betrayal of the school's Fightin' Gamecocks identity; one even went so far as to call it "dumbing down our culture."

No, really. He did. 

Anyway, the previous owners have decided if the culture is going to be dumbed down, then it's not happening with their nickname. Sir Big Spur, see, is what the previous owners dubbed the original, back in 1999. So they're contending it belongs to them, not to the university, and are demanding a name change.

Likely this will result in merely shortening the name to "Spur." But the Blob could hardly miss the opportunity to inject itself into a mascot renaming debate. I mean, it's pretty much the Holy Grail of Mascot Appreciation Zone activities.

And so away with Sir Big Spur, and on with ...

Comb-over Cal (A nod to the controversy that sparked the name change)

Sir Topham Knot (Ditto)

Fill Your Hand You Sonofabitch (A nod to Rooster Cogburn of "True Grit" fame)

Barney (Rooster ... barnyard ... OK, forget it)

Gamey (South Carolina ... Gamecock ... OK, forget that, too)

Foghorn Keghorn (A nod to fabled cartoon character Foghorn Leghorn, and also to tailgating)

"Crow" Magnon, Eater of Worlds and Disembowler of Various Tigers, Wildcats and Bulldo--

OK. So now I'm just getting silly.  

But "Spur" seems kinda lame, if you ask me. Also "Cock Commander", the leader in the clubhouse in a fan poll.

Come on, folks. Put on those thinkin' caps. 

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