Sunday, January 19, 2020

Comparative analysis

And now for a Blob feature the Blob just made up, You Could Be These Guys, in which the Blob turns the old saying "The grass is always greener" completely assbackwards and cattywampus.

In other words, sometimes the grass is browner. Or not grass at all, but a carpet of various exotic weeds that can't be killed by anything short of napalm.

For instance: You might have noticed that Indiana University's men's basketball team actually won a Big Ten road game last night, even though it was only Nebraska and Nebraska is 7-11 and one of the two worst teams in the conference.

You might also have noticed that the Hoosiers -- now 14-4 no matter what a certain portion of the Indiana fan base tries to tell you -- actually hit yon broad side of the barn for once, shooting 50 percent from the field and putting three players in double figures.

You might have also noticed that, despite that, the Indianas still couldn't hit Yon Broad Side from the 3-point arc, doinking 18 of their 26 attempts from there.

Enter the You Could Be These Guys portion of our program.

"These Guys," in this case, being the Vanderbilt Commodores, who are playing much below their rank this year. They're 8-9 overall and 0-4 in the SEC, tied for last in the conference with Ole Miss. So it's probably not surprising they lost by 21 yesterday to Tennessee, 66-45.

What's a tad more surprising is that, in doing so, they did something they hadn't done in 34 years.

They attempted 25 3-pointers. And they missed them all.

That hadn't happened to the Commodores in 1,080 games, which is pretty impressive if you think about it. One thousand eighty straight games hitting at least one triple. Not a bad little run.

Of course, perhaps even more impressive is the streak ended on a night when Vandy attempted 25 threes. Twenty-five. You'd think one would have gone in just by accident.

But, nah.  Give 'em a big fat donut.

And Indiana?

Eight-of-26 doesn't look so bad, suddenly.

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