I know who's going to win Game 1 of the World Series tonight. It's the water bottle guy.
Also the fan guy. Also the ice bag guy.
This is because it's supposed to hit 101 in Los Angeles today, which is not all that unusual for late October if you listen to the climate change Flat Earthers, and completely bizarre if you listen to anyone with a working synapse. By gametime, it likely will have cooled down to 98 or so, which would make it the hottest game-time temp for an MLB playoff game since they began recording such things.
What this will do is add a touch of the surreal to what already is real, given that Dodgers-vs.-Astros would have been an NLDS game not all that long ago. Some of us still can't wrap our heads around the Astros in the American League, just as some of us can't wrap our heads around the Astros wearing semi-normal-looking uniforms instead of the famous Technicolor yawn unis worn by this guy.
Anyway ... it's Dallas Keuchel against Clayton Kershaw in Game 1, and the last one to dissolve into a puddle of sweat wins. And, yes, that will be surreal, watching guys sweat during a World Series. Usually they all look like the Michelin Man during the Series, bundled up in layers with towels wrapped around their necks.
Well, not tonight. And so you can officially dub this the Weird Series, which suggests the Astros have the edge because they've never won a World Series and if they win this one it would only be the storyline remaining faithful to the theme.
Unfortunately, storylines hardly ever stick to the theme. And so the Blob is picking the Dodgers in six, because their pitching is a tad better and their bats are a tad better, too.
Sorry, Houston.
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