And now this week's edition of The NFL In So Many Words -- the yin-and-yang Blob feature that's either really, really good or really, really bad, and of which critics have said "Bad! I'll take bad!", and also, "I got a good fist and a bad fist. You choose which one you want for your knuckle hoagie":
1. The Packers edged the 0-4 Buccaneers 17-14. The Cowboys had to come from behind to beat the 0-4 Texans 34-30.
2. "Ha! See? Told ya we didn't suck!" (The Packers, who, let's face, still pretty much suck)
3. "Ha! See? We are BACK, baby! We are sooooo back!" (The Cowboys, who probably aren't as back as everyone always says they are when they win one)
4. In other news, the Dolphins remained winless after losing to the undefeated Vikings. The Chargers remained winless after losing to the 3-1 Seahawks.
5. "Are we the best team in the NFL? Hell, yeah, we're the best team in the NFL!" (The Vikings, who might be the best team in the NFL, but also might not even be the best team in the NFC North)
6. "Are we still the champs? Hell, yeah, we're still the champs!" (The Seahawks, forgetting the unbeaten 49ers are still in their division)
7. "Are we still in the division? Hell, yeah we're still in the division!" (The 49ers)
8. Meanwhile, the Bills jacked around and lost at home to the Patriots (which they always seem to do), and the Cardinals jacked around and lost to the Giants (and Jameis Winston)
9. "Gah! How do we always jack around and lose to the Patriots?" (The Bills)
10. "Gah! How did we jack around and lose to Jameis Winston?" (The Cardinals)"
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