Off schedule

 Stepped outside this morning as daylight came up like a theater curtain, and I could see my breath. The air was fleece-over-flannel-shirt chilly, and a thin layer of frost tinged the  brown March grass a sort of off-white.

Didn't feel like spring, in other words. Even if the birds were already up and trilling to beat the band. 

And yet ...

And yet, Opening Day, boys and girls!

The crack of a bat. The hum of the crowd. The bray of an umpire's full-throated call ("Steee-RIKE!");  the heady perfume of popping corn and 'dogs on the rotisserie; a whisper of breeze taking the edge off the sun hot on your ne-

I'm sorry, what?

You mean today is NOT Opening Day?

You mean it's not 'til TOMORROW?

You mean I have to wait one more whole day before Paul Skenes takes the hill for my Pittsburgh Cruds against the sorry-ass Miami Marlins, and the Cruds' quest for 162-0 officially begins?

But ... but that's CRAZY!

"No," you're saying now. "That's baseball."

Which is maybe more adept at getting in its own way than any sport except IndyCar, which has turned getting in its own way into a growth industry. (A process that continued Sunday, when the IndyCar race at the Thermal Club course drew pathetic viewership in part because the Fox broadcast went off the air for 20 minutes and Thermal is, well, a horrible venue). 

Anyway ...

Anyway, baseball once again decided crazy was the way to go. Because if commissioner Rob Manfred and the gang weren't crazy, they would have scheduled Opening Day for today, and not for tomorrow.

When it will go head-to-head with the Sweet Sixteen.

Seriously, who does that? Who doesn't know that in March it's all about basketball, basketball, basketball? Who is so deaf to the thunder of Da Tournament that he or she looked at a calendar and failed to realize that March 27 was the first day of the Sweet Sixteen?

Scene from some boardroom somewhere, months ago:

"Well, guys, it's time to schedule Opening Day for next year. Whatta ya say? March 27 work for you?"

"Um, isn't that a Thursday, boss?"

"Yeah. So?"

"Um, isn't the NCAA basketball tournament going on then?"

"Yeah. Again, so?"

"Well, um, I'm looking at the tournament calendar here, and according to this, the Sweet Sixteen falls on March 27 and 28. Which means it'll be wall-to-wall buckets and bracketeering those two days. If we want Opening Day to be Opening Day -- you know, an event -- shouldn't we think about making it the 26th? Beat the crowd, so to speak?"

(Long pause)

"Ah, it'll be fine. Not everyone watches that thing. Heck, when's the last time we had an NCAA tournament office pool?"

(Long pause)

(Longer pause)

(Guy who won last year's pool clears his throat)

"Ummm ..."