And now the first 2022 edition of The NFL In So Many Words, the Blob feature of which critics have said "Maybe it won't be as stupid this year," and also, "Oh, please, it's going to be just as stupid as ever":
1. "AIEEE! AIEEE!" (Baker Mayfield, running in terror from the Steelers' pass rush, which sacked him nine times in the Steelers' 26-14 win)
2. Live look at the Steelers' pass rush chasing Mayfield.
3. Live look at Mayfield.
4. Meanwhile, the Bengals' Joe Burrow!
5. Is clearly NOT Akili Smith. Or David Klingler. Or A.J. McCarron. Or Turk Schonert.
6. "Yay! We didn't draft any of those guys this time!" (Bengals' fans)
7. "We're gonna clinch a playoff spot today! We're gonna clinch a playoff spot today!" (Colts fans)
8. "Dammit!" (Also Colts fans)
9. The Giants got embarrassed by the cruddy Bears. The Jets almost knocked off the Buccaneers, but of course didn't. Combined record: 8-24.
10. "Yay! Six weeks until pitchers and catchers report!" (New York football fans)
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