The broadcaster's Art

Once upon an eon your Indiana Hoosiers used to play in Final Fours. Let's begin there this evening.

Once upon a time they had a couple of kids named Graham (Pat and Greg), and a Damon (Bailey) and a Calbert (Cheaney), and one Saturday night they played Duke in a national semifinal. They lost, of course. Everyone thought it was a crying shame -- especially Indiana fans of a particularly grassy-knoll bent.

Which brings us to a local radio show called SportsTalk, and to a lovely man named Art Saltsberg.

You know who Art Saltsberg is, even if you don't know who Art Saltsberg is. If you've listened WOWO 1190 AM anytime in the last 50 years, you've heard his voice coming out of your radio. He's the voice of a million ads for insurance and auto repair and lord knows how many other local businesses, and he knew all the people you did know, like Bob Sievers and Jack Underwood and Jay Gould, and of course Bob Chase, too. And of course you heard him on SportsTalk for two hours every weekday night, sidekicking with Dean Pantazi of WPTA 21Alive.

But back to those Hoosiers fans of a particularly grassy-knoll bent.

On a Monday night in 1992, two days after Duke dispatched Indiana in the national semifinal, Art found himself sidekicking with a certain local sports guy of lesser renown. That would be me, filling in for Dean as best I could for someone who was better at writing words than speaking them.

Anyway ... Art opened the phone lines, and here came Noah's flood.

IU fans practically crawled out of the woodwork that night, all of them equipped with dark conspiracy theories. The game officials hosed the poor Hoosiers, and the reason they hosed the poor Hoosiers is because they were in on the deal. CBS, you see, wanted Duke to win. It wanted Duke to win because it figured Coach K and the boys, being college hoops royalty and all, would pump more air in the championship game ratings than Indiana would. So they slipped the Whistles a little cash under the table to make sure it happened.

Or, you know, something like that.

On and on it went, through one and hour and then into two. And finally Art had heard enough.

The umpteenth guy started in on CBS and the refs and the evil machinations of (bleeping) Duke, and Art cut him off. Told him what he was saying was ridiculous, or words to that effect. Told the man he was flat crazy ... or words to that effect.

I mention this because it was the first, and maybe the only time, I ever heard Art Saltsberg semi-lose it on the air.

I also mention it because Art Saltsberg is retiring after 50 years at WOWO as a salesman and broadcaster. So it seemed like the right time.

Here's what you should know about Art Saltsberg: He was the professional's professional, and an utterly decent guy besides. There may be nicer people in the business, but I've never run across one. He was also one of the more prepared people I ever ran across. Sharing a broadcast desk with Art on SportsTalk meant you also shared a desk piled high with of printouts and stats and various and sundry items of interest. You were never going to run out of things to talk about when you went on the air with Art.

His easygoing nature, and the way he and Dean played so well off one another, was also why SportsTalk drew such a loyal and regular audience of callers. There was Jerry from Philly and Vaughn and of course Basil from Reiffsburg, who figured in perhaps Art and Dean's finest moment.

Basil, you see, was a teenager whose full handle was Basil Rhodes, and therein hangs a tale. Basil was born with a condition called osteogenesis impertecta, or brittle bone disease. It meant Basil could break bones simply by rolling over, and left him, as a high school student, bedridden and the size of an infant.

But he was smart and funny and loved to give Dean what-for about his Cubs, because Basil was a diehard Mets fan. No one who ever met him, before he died at 18, came away without marveling at him.

And so, one night, Art and Dean drove down to Basil's home in Reiffsburg, and broadcast SportsTalk from his living room. Even had Basil sign off for them at the end of the show.

I don't know who got more out of the whole thing, Basil or Art and Dean. Call it a dead heat.

Ask Art Saltsberg today, and I guarantee you he'd tell you it was a night he'll never forget. I know I sure won't.

Nor will I forget the Night of the Grassy Knoll People. And the man on the other mic who made it, and everything, so very enjoyable.