Thursday, May 23, 2019

Straying from your lane

I wouldn't know Milwaukee Bucks coach Mike Budenholzer if he designed an iso play for Giannis Antetokounmpo to post me up and take me to the tin.  But the guy does know what boundaries are.

There are players and coaches, see, and then there are fans. And never the twain should mingle.

Which brings us to the subject of Drake, the entertainer who is the Toronto Raptors' designated superfan. Or, as Budenholzer wonderfully describes him: "Whatever it is exactly that Drake is for the Toronto Raptors."

Budenholzer's wondering that, and we're wondering that, because Drake pulled this little stunt the other night.

Now, Raptors Nick Nurse said he didn't even realize Drake had given him a quick shoulder rub, he was so locked in to the job at hand. This may actually be true. Or it may be Nick Nurse not wanting to offend a supporter who, after all, is not just a supporter but a Superstar Rapper.*

(* -- Drake's official title, apparently).

In any case, it put Drake squarely on the wrong side of those aforementioned boundaries, and prompted Budenholzer to wonder aloud what exactly he is. Is he a fan? Is he like, you know, a mascot or something, in which case he's a quasi-employee of the Raptors? Or is he just a quasi-famous guy who's as cluelessly self-absorbed as a lot of quasi-famous guys?

Inquiring minds want to know. Because giving the head coach a shoulder squeeze in the middle of a game -- or wandering up and down the sideline behind Coach, as Drake was also doing -- certainly isn't normal fan behavior. In fact, it's kind of fun to wonder what the reaction would be if everyday Joe Fan decided to do some of the stuff Drake does.

JOE FAN: (giving Nurse a shoulder squeeze): "You got this, Coach! Yeaah, baby!"

NURSE (wheeling around): "The hell?!"

After which security arrives to escort Joe Fan from the premises.

Of course, that's not going to happen if Joe Fan is named Drake, which is why Drake can get away with what he gets away with. Whether or not he should is another question. Budenholzer says no, and the Blob heartily agrees. I've seen what happens when fans have no boundaries, and it rarely ends well.

In the county lockup, generally. Or sometimes in contusions, abrasions and worse.

The iconic example of the latter, of course, happened back in the 1960s, when a rambunctious fan in Baltimore got loose on the old Memorial Stadium turf between plays of a Colts NFL game. Grabbed the football, this fan did, and gleefully took off running.

For about five or six steps.

At which point Colts linebacker Mike Curtis did this.

No one's going to do that to Drake, of course. No matter how obnoxious and inappropriately he behaves, no one's going to come flying over the sideline and Mike Curtis his Superstar Rapper ass.

Well. Not without making it look like an accident, that is.

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