Cheatin' by any other name

I'm sure I speak for everyone this a.m. when I say "Wait ... what?"

By which I mean, "Wait ... what? Juicing in curling?"

Well, yes, boys and girls, there is juicing in curling, especially if (surprise, surprise) you happen to be Russian. Show of hands here. When Russian curler Alexander Krushelnitsky failed a drug test the other day, was anyone really surprised? And if athletes will juice in curling, what's next?

Waiting now for that upcoming doping scandal in the world Scrabble championships. Waiting also for the expose that will reveal Boris Spassky was using the Cream and the Clear when he played Bobby Fischer for the chess championship of the universe back in 1972.

Because, you know, the Russian thing.

This brings us to the obvious point, which is why the Russian athletes are even at these Winter Games. A whole pile of them got tossed out, originally, only to be reinstated. Now they're competing not as Russia but as the Olympic Athletes from Russia (OAR), which means if any of them wins a gold medal the Russian flag will not be raised,  nor will the Russian anthem be played.

Altogether now: Woooo! That'll show 'em!

Or, you know, not.

After all, they'll still get to go home with an Olympic gold medal, when (according to many, many other athletes at the Games) they shouldn't be there at all. And they're still representing Russia, even if the Russian Olympic committee wasn't allowed to be in PyeongChang, and even if the Russian flag doesn't fly and the Russian anthem goes unheard. So where's the punishment here for the rampant doping by Russian athletes?

Beats me. All I know is, in letting them compete as the OAR, the IOC has one oar out of the water.

Or, you know, something like that.