Tour time!

 The Tour de France wraps up today with three short climbs up Montmarte in Paris, and what I know about that is my wife and stayed at the foot of it back in 2005 and found this humble little place halfway up the hill that became our favorite restaurant in Paris.

Other than that, I got nothin'. Or right next door to nothin'.

Truth is, I haven't paid much attention to the Tour de France since it was the Tour de Syringe and Lance Armstrong was the godfather of HGH or something close to it. Lance won the thing every year, it seemed, until it came out he was a stone psychopath bullying his teammates into injecting themselves with horse testicles or some such thing, and banishing those who refused.

All that was a long time ago, however. Now I read that today is the last stage of the 2025 Tour, and everything I know about it you could fit in the cheesy basket on the front of my old 26-inch Huffy -- the one with the cheesy white wall tires and the Chico Salmon baseball cards flapping in the spokes.

Tadej Pogacar will definitely not be riding a Huffy up Montmarte today, but he's almost certainly going to be cruising down the Champs Elysees as the king of the Tour when it's all over. He's got a comfortable lead on Jonas Vingegaard, and if he maintains it he'll be the Tour champion for the fourth time.

So who is Tadej Pogacar, you might ask?

(Or not. You may have already bailed on this post when you found out it wasn't about baseball, NFL training camps or ... NFL training camps. If so, go with God.)

Anyway, who is Tadej Pogacar?

Well, he's a 26-year-old Slovenian who's the new Lance Armstrong, presumably without the Michael Corleone gene. Last year he became only the third male bike racer in history to win the sport's Triple Crown, which means he won the Tour, the Giro d'Italia and the World Championships in the same year. He's also became the only bike racer in history to win the Triple Crown and two monuments in the same year, whatever the hell a monument is.

(Just kidding. Monuments are other notable bike races. In Pogacar's case, the Liege-Bastogne-Liege and the Giro di Lombardia, both of which he won in 2024.)

In any event, Pogacar is a heck of a bike rider. So here's to him, even if he won't be riding a 26-inch Huffy with whitewall tires.

But it would be cooler if he did, to quote Wooderson from "Dazed and Confused".