And now, another ill-fitting suit

 The Blob could never sit on a judicial bench, for any number of very good reasons. 

("Not smart enough?" I hear you saying).

Well, yes. That's one reason. 

Another is there would be too many times when I would violate courtroom protocol by laughing out loud.

Which brings us to the lawsuit filed the other day on behalf of Jon Gruden, the Oakland Raiders coach who lost his job because, well, he's just a dumb ol' football coach. One who likes to send e-mails that poke tired unfunny fun at black people's lips, and project dumb ol' football coach attitudes about gay people and women and black players who protest and the NFL commissioner, Roger Goodell, whom he referred to using the homophobe's favorite term, the "F" word.

All of this, and much more, got him fired, as well it should have. But of course, he's the victim here.

Or so his lawsuit against Goodell and the NFL maintains, charging that they leaked the aforementioned e-mails as part of a "malicious and organized campaign" to run him out of the league, doing so at mid-season to inflict "maximum damage" on Gruden and his team.

This is about the time Judge Blob would slap his knee and begin to howl.

Yes, Jon, and Jon's suits, I'm sure Roger Goodell was sitting in his office at NFL headquarters, scheming how to get rid of one of the league's coaches before,  I don't know, his team squeaked into the playoffs or something. By the time Gruden resigned, after all, his Raiders were 3-2 and had just lost by double digits to the Chargers and Bears. Prior to that, they'd needed overtime to beat the Dolphins.

Sounds like a Super Bowl team to me.

Gruden's lawsuit maintains that, when Gruden failed to resign after the first e-mails hit the papers, Goodell intentionally leaked a pile of others. All of them were collected during the league's investigation into the Washington Football Team, which was alleged to have created a misogynist corporate culture that, among other things, turned its cheerleaders into call girls. 

Thus did Gruden become the victim here.

And again I'm laughing.

Because whether or not Goodell actually leaked more e-mails, Gruden was already done. And he'd done it to himself. Goodell would not have had to lift a finger; with or without the additional published e-mails, Gruden would have been forced to resign in days. Anyone who's ever seen these scenarios unfold knows this.

Sorry, Coach. You want to spew a lot of next-level stupidity and knuckle-dragging ignorance, don't blame others for the consequences. You have the right to say and believe whatever you want to in this country -- look at the crazy shite some our elected representatives trot out there -- but your employer has no obligation to keep cutting you a paycheck if you do. 

In other words, Coach: Man up and take some responsibility. Because the only one who's victimized you is in the mirror.