Gettin' drafty

 Well, alrighty, then. So the Cleveland Browns braintrust will not get a chance to turn Travis Hunter into, I don't know, a placekicker or something.

Instead, Brownie the Elf traded down, and Jacksonville and the New York Giants traded up, and Shedeur Sanders traded hubris for humble pie, or some such thing. Whatever. The Bears and Colts both picked tight ends, so who cares, right?

Which is the Blob's cockeyed review of Thursday's first round of the NFL Draft, which the Blob again did not watch because sometimes it likes to pretend it has a life. Also I'm allergic to draft gurus prattling on about tight skin or burst or waist-bending or all the other esoterica with which they fill those endless minutes between picks.

Anyway ... here's some stuff that happened:

1. Miami (Fla.) quarterback Cam Ward went No. 1, as expected, to the Tennessee Titans.

I don't know if this is a good pick. I don't know if this is a bad pick. Frankly I wouldn't know Cam Ward from Cam Shaft. Supposedly he was the best QB in a weak draft for QBs. So I guess we'll see.

2. The Browns traded the second pick to the Jaguars, who used it to select Hunter, the all-world two-way star from Colorado.

Does this mean the Jags plan on playing Hunter at both cornerback and wide receiver? Beats me. All I know is the Jags' quarterback is still Trevor Lawrence. This raises the exciting prospect of seeing Hunter trying to chase down overthrown balls, underthrown balls and balls Trevor Lawrence shouldn't have oughta thrown.

3. The Giants, having already selected Penn State edge rusher Abdul Carter, traded up later in the first round to take Ole Miss quarterback Jaxson Dart.

This immediately makes Jaxson Dart the Jints' third-string quarterback of the future, seeing how Russell Wilson and Jameis Winston are already on the roster. Why would the Giants trade up to take a quarterback who may not play that much in 2025, if at all?

I don't know. They're the Giants. Why do they do anything?

4. The Bears took Michigan tight end Colston Loveland with the 10th pick. The Colts took Penn State tight end Tyler Warren with the 14th pick. 

Both look like terrific picks, especially the superbly athletic Warren, whom Penn State lined up pretty much everywhere. This means there's an outside chance the Bears, and especially the Colts, didn't screw up for once.

Something, blind squirrel, acorn, something.

And last, and for the moment, least ...

5. It's Friday morning and Colorado quarterback Shedeur Sanders is still waiting on a phone call.

I don't know if this is just because he's Deion Sanders' kid, or because, as Deion Sanders' kid, he talked all kinds of smack pre-draft about how only teams that wanted to change their entire culture should pick him. 

No, really. He actually said that. 

NFL teams being notoriously averse to too much swagger in a rookie (and too bright a spotlight on same, which could lead to the dreaded "distraction"), everyone passed on Shedeur in the first round. Which was fairly amazing. I mean, even Jaxson Dart went in the first round.

Meanwhile, the Browns, who said "nah" to Shedeur even though they could use a quarterback, have the first pick in the second round. So there's a decent chance he could wind up in Cleveland.

Where there's a decent chance Shedeur Sanders could be either the Brownies' first culture-changing QB since Bernie Kosar, or the next Tim Couch, Brady Quinn, Brandon Weeden, Johnny Manziel et al.