Flag football

 Tuesday morning after the big holiday weekend, and Curmudgeon Boy has broken his surly bonds again. Someone left the gate open, and now he's out there roaming free in my brain and, who knows, probably leaving little Curmudgeon Boy piles in places he shouldn't.

Which is to say I've been listening to the chatter about the Michigan-Ohio State brawl, and the other brawls that broke out in college rivalry games over the weekend, and it's brought out the cranky old guy in me. And also all the cranky old guy bromides.

Such as: Winners, act like you've been there before.

And also: Losers, accept your fate with humility and no loud noises.

This goes back to Paul Brown, the original Curmudgeon Boy of football, who once said when you win say very little, and when you lose, say even less. 

Not anymore, apparently.

Now the winners can't wait to rub salt in the wound after rivalry games, and the losers are no longer disposed to put up with it. This betrays a general lack of discipline on the part of both, even though the Blob tends to side with the losers in this matter. It takes less discipline to taunt than it does not to respond to it.

Which brings us to this whole flag-planting business.

Two geniuses from Michigan decided it would be a good idea to plant a giant M flag on the Ohio State logo after upsetting the rival Buckeyes in Columbus, touching off the brawl we've all seen on TV by now. This happens all the time now in rivalry games -- remember Baker Mayfield planting an OU flag on the same Buckeyes logo years ago, after Oklahoma upset the Buckeyes? -- and it's a disgusting phenomenon.

Winners win with class. The ones who don't are only losers in disguise. Thus sayeth Curmudgeon Boy.

But, nah. The two Michigan geniuses decided instead to rub it in with the flag business, and further decided it would be an excellent idea to do it with the Buckeyes still milling around at midfield. Especially considering how bitter this rivalry is, what did they think was gonna happen?  The Ohio State players were just gonna say "Ha-ha, good one, Wolverines"?

Of course not. An Ohio State player ripped the flag away, both teams waded into one another, and it took cops with pepper spray to break it up. Meanwhile, Florida players were fighting with Florida State players after the Gators tried to plant a flag on the Florida State logo in Tallahassee, and North Carolina and North Carolina State players were throwing down after the Wolfpack tried to plant a flag on the Tar Heels logo.

Enough, people. Enough.

Look. No one appreciates a good college football rivalry more than the Blob, and the more enmity the better. Michigan and Ohio State certainly didn't invent the latter on Saturday afternoon; go back 50 years, and you'll see Woody Hayes tearing up sideline markers in a fit of rage during the Michigan game, and coasting across the state line on fumes because he refused to buy gas in Michigan. 

Great stuff. But Woody and his splendid doppelganger Bo Schembechler at least had the good sense to get their teams the hell off the field after Ohio State-Michigan games. Sherrone Moore and Ryan Day, not so much.

Moore you can partly understand, because his team had just scored a jaw-dropping upset and were, as they say, in the moment. No such excuse for Day, who stood and watched as his players waded into the Michigans. 

One would have thought, considering what he's said in the past about how special is THE Ohio State University, that he would have been reminding his players what they represented, and to conduct themselves accordingly. Perhaps by grabbing a facemask or two to get the point across.

And Moore?

Same message to his Wolverines. Delivered the same way if need be.

The good news here is the Big Ten refused to put up with all the nonsense, and dropped a $100,000 fine on both schools.  And given what happened elsewhere, the NCAA may waken from its slumber long enough to ban planting flags on rival logos.

Curmudgeon Boy would be A-OK with that.

He'd also be A-OK with coaches controlling their players. But I suppose that's too much to ask these days.