And now this week's edition of The NFL In So Many Words, the double-vaxxed, boosted, masked, asymptomatic Blob feature of which critics have said "I don't care! Stay away from me!", and also "You're sick! I can tell you're sick! I cast you out! Out, I tell you!"
1. "OK, who wants to play offensive line tonight? Lucky fans now eligible with negative test!" (The New Orleans Saints, who played the Dolphins Monday night missing 20 players because of Bastard Plague protocols)
2. "Woo-hoo! My first NFL start!" (Saints backup-backup quarterback Ian Book)
3. "Aaaaahhh! Aaaaaahhh!" (Ian Book, running for his life in the Saints' 20-3 loss, in which the Dolphins sacked Book eight times)
4. Saints' O-line lineup: Joe Bob, Jim Bob, Tim Bob, Tom Bob and Bob Bob.
5. Meanwhile, the Colts!
6. Beat the Cardinals despite being depleted themselves, thanks in part to Carson Wentz's stellar outing.
7. Live look this week at Colts' quarterback Carson Wentz, who's unvaccinated on a team that now has 14 players in The Protocols.
8. "See? We can so win!" (The Bears)
9. "Yeah, but it was just the Seahawks." (America)
10. "Why don't THESE teams have 'rona issues?" (Also America, watching the Jets beat Jacksonville in the Relegation Bowl)
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