All about the green

 Happy Mom's Day from the Blob, and shut the door, were you born in barn?

Also, I swear sometimes you don't have the sense God gave a goose.

Also, pick up that pig sty you call a room.

And last not least ...

You think money grows on trees?

Well, it doesn't, and that's why no one seems to want poor Albert Pujols, a surefire first-ballot Hall of Famer whom serious people believe might be the greatest first baseman of all time. But he's 41 years old now, and age and injury have eroded his skills as they have for everyone in the history of the game. And that's why the Angels of Anaheim And Neighboring Communities released him the other day.

His value, see, no longer justifies the Angels' further investment beyond his current deal, which runs out at the end of this season. And it's why no one else has yet picked him up, because there are few available roster spots for a pricey 41-year-old whose aforementioned skills have been eroded by the aforementioned time and injury.

Everything's about the green stuff in America, after all. About the lettuce, the dough, the simoleons, the jing.

This has always been true to an extent, because to an extent America is at bottom a great engine of commerce. And it's as true in Sportsball World as it is everywhere else -- even in precincts which claim not to be engines of commerce.

Which brings us to the University of Hartford, last seen celebrating its men's basketball team's first-ever berth in March Madness.

The whole university was in a lather over this historic achievement, even though it ended quickly with a first-round loss to eventual NCAA champ Baylor. But before that happened, the nation got to learn a lot of cool stuff about the University of Hartford, like the fact there was a University of Hartford, and that among its alums are a star (Dionne Warwick), an Apollo 13 astronaut (the late Jack Swigert) and a Hall of Fame baseball player (Jeff Bagwell).

But now the University of Hartford has pulled the plug on all that.

That's because the other day its Board of Regents voted to demote the school from Division I to Division III.

It is, of course, a money deal, which is essentially what board chairman David Gordon meant when he said the move was in the "best long-term interests of all (Hartford's) students." In other words: Division I is expensive, and, as it is at most schools Hartford's size, only the athletes truly benefit from that expense.

In fact, there are a whole lot of schools with similar demographics who wind up partially subsiding their D-I athletics with student fees, and often substantial student fees. A move to D-III, which doesn't offer athletic scholarships, would seem to alleviate that.

This doesn't mean Hartford's Board didn't pick the absolute worst time to make this announcement. It did, and the resulting backlash will be fierce. It's already begun, in fact; the softball team blacked out the school's name on their jerseys the other day, and student-athletes are on the march in protest.

It's hard not to sympathize. The men's basketball team must feel especially dissed, being told their ceiling-shattering moment two months ago ultimately meant nothing. And the fact Hartford has been D-I for almost 40 years ...

Well. How hard a sell did those two items make this?

And yet ...

And yet, it's probably the prudent move. Because, no, money really doesn't grow on trees.

Just like Mom said.