Grumpy old men

I am 63 years old, which I freely admit makes me prone to occasional fits of Shaking My Liver-Spotted Fist and Shouting At Clouds. So I suppose I'm the last one who should be poking the crotchety old geezers (Joe Buck ... Troy Aikman ... various other relics in the studio) who got all wrathy about end zone celebrations yesterday.

To be specific, they got all wrathy about Saints wide receiver Michael Thomas, who pulled a legacy celebration at the end of a 72-yard touchdown catch from Drew Brees.

What Thomas did was, he pulled a planted flip phone from the padding around the goalpost and pretended to make a call. Which incurred a 15-yard penalty that (it turned out) didn't actually matter, because there were less than four minutes to play and Thomas' touchdown put the Saints up by 10.

What was cool about that is it was a spot-on tribute to former Saints wideout Joe Horn doing the same thing 15 years ago. What was uncool, although hugely amusing, was the way all the grumpy old men spluttered and shook their liver-spotted fists and said it was a crying damn shame Thomas had to make it about himself.

Just as Thomas' little joke was a not-so-instant replay of Horn's, that was a not-so-instant replay of the reaction Horn got from Metamucil-gumming codgers like Tony Kornheiser, who fumed that Horn "should be fined a million dollars."

And what does this occasionally grumpy old man say about all that?

Only this: Chill out, Alice. Here's a cold cloth. Go lie down in the parlor until the vapors pass.

Look, the NFL is gray and corporate and frankly boring enough without resurrecting the ghost of the old No Fun League. And so I say, good on ya, Michael Thomas, for giving us a bit of whimsy. Plus, it was a clever little nod to history, which meant those who remembered Joe Horn got to share a knowing little chuckle at the expense of those who didn't.

And you know the best thing?

It wasn't the only time an NFL team got caught having fun yesterday.

The Bears, in the midst of their 41-9 party in Buffalo, posed for a faux team photo after one score. And the Seahawks broke out this inspired bit of choreography after one of their touchdowns.

I suppose somewhere in America the old school brigade watched that, shook their chicken wings at the screen and mourned for the days when players used to act like they'd been there before when they scored a touchdown. Like when Larry Csonka ran over 15 guys, flipped the ball to the official and never once changed his expression.

Now that was football, people. You know, deadly serious, the way God intended.

You, there. Wipe that smile off your face.