Footsore

So, this week's Chicago Bears placekicker, Eddie Pineiro, missed an extra point so badly last night it landed in Winnetka, according to this right here from Deadspin. And so the NFL's version of Ted Mack's Original Amateur Hour (look it up, young'uns) continues.

Pineiro is the tenth kicker the Bears have had on the premises this summer, and the only one currently still on the premises. So it looks like he's the guy.

He did stick a 58-yarder against the Colts last week. And he made three short field goals last night. And while that extra point looked really bad (except to the lucky kid in Winnetka who now has an official NFL football), at least he hasn't banked anything off the goalposts or the crossbar or head coach Matt Nagy's groin.

That no doubt checks a huge box for the Bears and Nagy, who continue to be haunted by the ghost of Cody Parkey to a comic degree. Parkey, remember, double-doinked the point-blank miss that chased the Bears from the playoffs last season. Off the goalpost ... off the crossbar ... hello, offseason.

And so here came the parade of legs through Halas Hall, more legs than the Rockettes, it seemed. And the wheel has apparently stopped on Pineiro.

For the time being, anyway.

Because you know what's going to happen now, right?

First time Pineiro serves up another souvenir to another kid in Winnetka, the wheel will begin to spin again. Carli Lloyd? Hell, yes, bring her in. What's Morten Andersen doing these days? Anyone know where Jan Stenerud is? Is Tom Dempsey still alive?

The mind reels with the possibilities ...

Bears assistant: Hey, Coach Nagy! Guess who's at O'Hare, waiting for a connecting?

Nagy: Who?

Assistant: Pele!

Nagy: What? Hell, man, get out there! Here, take this contract ...

That sort of thing.

And in the meantime?

Get your kid out there in the backyard. You never know.