Stage play

The statue, posted like a sentry outside the north end of Lucas Oil Stadium, is every inch No. 18. David Letterman had a nice Letterman-ly schtick, punctuated by a great line about how Indianapolis now has a skyline because of No. 18. And on Sunday afternoon, No. 18 went up on the ring of honor in the house No. 18 built.

Then No. 2 decided to horn in on Peyton Manning's big weekend.

That would be Mike Pence, former governor of Indiana and architect of the Great I-69 Extension Calamity, and now the nation's No. 2 man behind our only available president. He showed up to honor Peyton, or so he said. Then he trampled all over Peyton's weekend with a cheap political stunt.

Insufferable sanctimony is the province of all political animals, and Pence is nothing if not a pure political animal. So he did what political animals do, which is stage a sanctimonious "walkout" that was pure political theater -- and not even good political theater, given that everyone with a working brain cell knew the "walkout" was entirely calculated.

Look. I get it. The political game now is always to throw red meat at your base, and Pence's phony walkout was calibrated to the inch to do exactly that. Like everyone in America, he knew the San Francisco 49ers were going to kneel with their heads bowed for the national anthem, because they always do. And so you have to figure he knew exactly what he was going to do long before he stepped foot in The Luke yesterday.

He was going to walk out. Then he was going to tweet the usual blowholing nonsense about how he, Mike Pence, was not going to frequent an event where the American flag and American soldiers were disrespected. Because he, Mike Pence -- like his boss, Our Only Available President -- are patriots, by God, who respect America and the troops and apple pie and the purple mountains' majesty.

Of course, he didn't include this little tidbit: That reporters covering Pence were told before the game by Pence's handlers that he likely would be leaving early.

And so all of this was as transparent a load of cowflop as you're ever going to step in, which is saying something. That it was done at the taxpayers' expense, and at Peyton Manning's, made it all the more crass.

So does the fact that, like a lot of the "patriots," Pence doesn't even know what he's allegedly outraged by.

That business about disrespecting our soldiers by kneeling?

Hard to imagine how that's the case, considering it was a soldier's idea that they kneel.

Here's the story: When Colin Kaepernick first begin sitting out the anthem last year, he was contacted by a veteran. A dialogue was struck, and the vet and Kaepernick eventually got together. It was then  the vet suggested that, rather than sit, they kneel -- because at a military funeral, the flag is presented to the widow by a kneeling member of the color guard.

And so they do. It's a compromise that's supposed to send the message this isn't about disrespecting those who've served. And indeed it isn't, considering so many of those kneeling come from military families, or who have relatives who currently serve in the military.

Unfortunately, that message got lost when the politicians decided to get involved. Unfortunately, largely, so has Kaepernick's original point, which is that police officers really shouldn't go around shooting unarmed black folk when they probably don't need to.

How this became a controversial position is a neat window into just how thoroughly the nation and rational thought have parted ways. As is the fact Pence and Our Only Available President decided to become self-appointed (and completely unrequested) champions of "our soldiers."

The former, after all, never served. And the latter not only never served, but actively ducked military service when it was his turn to stand up for the flag he claims to revere so much.

What a crazy country.